Little Box Of Horrors - Part 2

Welcome to the second installment of Little Box Of Horrors, where I delve into a collection of dubious discs found last year in the cupboard under the stairs (Part 1 can be found here).

I'll begin with someone about whom I initially had reservations (as you will understand from the album covers) but have since developed quite a fondness.  For those of you unfamiliar with her work, may I introduce the wonderful world of Mrs Mills:

Pineapple and cheese cubes on cocktail sticks: check. Meat-paste
sandwiches: check. Awesome party music: cher-check!

Mrs Gladys Mills ("call me Glad, everyone else does"), a typing department superintendent from Loughton in Essex, had played the piano since she began lessons aged three. These came to an end when she was twelve after her teacher became annoyed with all the "twiddly bits" Gladys used to add to the tunes she was tasked with playing.

Many years later she was discovered by talent scout Paul Cave while playing piano with her band The Asterons at a golf club event in 1961, and from there became a prolific recording artist and variety TV fixture during the 60s and 70s.  She played a style of piano known as stride on an instrument that gave a honky-tonk or tack sound. The upright Steinway she played in the studio at Abbey Road became famous as "Mrs Mills' Piano" and was used by label-mates The Beatles on several songs including Lady Madonna and Penny Lane.

The lovely gold and black Parlophone label from the early 1960s,
which among other things, Mrs Mills shared with The Beatles.

EMI paired her up with arranger and master of easy listening Geoff Love, and she released many albums of sing-along pub-style party music - as you can see from the album covers the word "party" features heavily! She was a gifted pianist and it was those "twiddly bits" so disliked by her teacher that injected such life into her playing. This is explained very well in the affectionate and highly entertaining BBC4 documentary Let's Have A Party - The Piano Genius Of Mrs Mills: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FBIMVD_DDc which is definitely worth an hour of your time.

I found five of her albums in the box in the stair cupboard; the four pictured plus another called Especially For You tucked into the sleeve with Summer Party. My top pick is from her debut album Mrs Mills Plays the Roaring Twenties; her rendition of the American popular song Five Foot Two, Eyes of Blue:

The next bit of wonky wax from this exploration into the ropey side of 60s and 70s popular music is probably the one I was least looking forward to playing. "Even less than Des O'Connor?", I hear you cry? Well, yes. It's worse. Much worse. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr Max Bygraves:

Max Bygraves - Sing Along With Max (1972)

This was Max's fifth album, coming after 1969's The World of Max Bygraves and before he abandoned the space bar entirely and gave us 97 volumes of Singalongamax. No, that number's not a typo. Dear Mr Bygraves felt we needed NINETY-SEVEN albums of subpar crooning, not to mention many others including Singalongaxmas, Discologamax, Lingalongamax (no, me neither) and two volumes of SingAlongAWarYears, the first of which got to no.5 in the UK album chart in 1989.

Max, born Walter William Bygraves, was a comedian, actor and variety performer as well as a singer, and appeared on British TV from the 1950s up until the mid-90s. From a look at his discography it appears that he specialised in the nostalgia medley; song-length cheese-fests of between three and five different popular standards, wartime favourites and show tunes. For instance, here on Sing Along... we get the abominable mashup of Bye Bye Blackbird/Bill Bailey Won't You Please Come Home/Ma He's Making Eyes At Me/Oh You Beautiful Doll/Alexander's Ragtime Band followed by the vomit-inducing quartet of I'll Be With You In Apple Blossom Time/If I Had My Way/Edelweiss/The Whiffenpoof Song.

The sleevenotes state that,

"This is an album for all those millions of people throughout the world, who have succumbed to the charms of Max Bygraves on television, stage or radio"

and his sales figures seem to bear this out, as over 30 of his albums went either Gold or Platinum, frequently outselling Elvis, Bing Crosby and Sinatra.

It will come as no surprise that this first Sing Along album was recorded at the suggestion of his mother, and was

"calculated to raise a heart warming nostalgia in all the people who listen and remember....which will bring memories flooding back to their minds."

Little wonder then, that his records sold in such numbers to a certain generation.

I won't inflict any of the above on you; instead here's a Max Bygraves song I'm quite fond of, which I last heard on Christmas Day 2014 on Stewpot's Junior Choice special on BBC Radio 2:

That'll do for now, I'm off to cleanse my palette with some Nirvana and strong drink, but do pop back soon for Part 3 of Little Box Of Horrors featuring more terrible tunes and rotten revolvers.

Little Box of Horrors - Part 1

A few weeks ago me and my other half finally got round to the long overdue task of clearing out the cupboard under the stairs. (When I say "we", what I really mean is that he did most of the work while I pointed at each item as it came out, shouting "KEEP!", "RECYCLE!", "CHAZZA!" or "DUMP!" in an authoritative yet endearing manner.)

Lurking at the back was a box full of old records which once belonged to his parents. You must know by now that such a thing is like catnip to a crate digger like me, so in I went, completely unprepared and with no warning of the horrors it contained. Actually, there were some good records mixed in with the crap; half a dozen Dean Martin LPs and a handful of budget disco and soul compilations, but these were in the minority. Over the past few days I've been cleaning the least-scratched ones and giving them a spin. It's been quite an education. Let's have a look (don't worry, listening is not compulsory) at the worst offenders.

We begin with a name I'd never seen before: Gerry Monroe and his 1970 album Sally - Pride Of Our Alley:

Gerry Monroe - Sally - Pride Of Our Alley (1970)

Gerry (real name Henry Morris) was from South Shields, and after some time as a singer in working men's clubs he entered the ITV talent show Opportunity Knocks where he found favour and was signed to Chapter One Records. This was his first and most successful album and features three Top 40 hits, the best known being a cover of Gracie Fields' Sally.

The rather disturbing cover image (What's he looking at? Why doesn't she run away?) gives little clue as to the contents. Yes, he's head-to-toe in man-made fibres; yes, the rear sleeve lists mainly popular standards such as Danny Boy and Johnny Ray's Cry, and even as the first track began, it all seemed like very predictable, rather dull MOR. And then it happened. The man began to yodel. Not every word, but just now and then, carefully timed to cause maximum startlement and alarm in the poor, unsuspecting listener.

Doris Day's Secret Love is an early casualty and I'll never again be able to enjoy Gene Pitney's Something's Gotten Hold Of My Heart without it inducing flashbacks of the performance here, but the most heinous crime is that inflicted on Bridge Over Troubled Water. Luckily for you, dear reader, it isn't on youtube, so here's the title track instead:

The final track on the album is called She Taught Me How To Yodel. Oh did she Gerry, DID SHE?

The next slab of vicious vinyl to land on the turntable was by a face familiar to us all; Des O'Connor:

Des O'Connor - By Special Request (date unknown)

Chestnut-hued family entertainer Desmond Bernard O'Connor was a mainstay of British television from 1963, beginning with The Des O'Connor Show on ITV (that channel has a lot to answer for) and ending with Today With Des & Mel in 2006. This compilation on Music For Pleasure represents just a (mercifully) small proportion of his 36-album singing career, and is quite, quite dreadful.

Side 1 of By Special Request opens with a tune named Dick-a-dum-dum (I shit you not), which has to be heard to be believed, and managed to reach number 14 in the UK singles chart in June 1969, where it nestled between Jethro Tull's Living In The Past at 15 and Cliff Richard's Big Ship at 13. Number 1 that week was Tommy Roe with Dizzy. 

What follows is some very accomplished and cheesy crooning which includes another 1969 Top 20 single Loneliness, blooming Danny Boy again and a God-awful cover of George Harrison's Something.

Here's Dick-a-dum-dum, brought to you on the very same album by some mad person on youtube. Don't say I didn't warn you:

That's all for today - the second part of Little Box Of Horrors will be with you soon. Come back if you dare!

2014 - a year in car boot vinyl

Let's hope 2015 is just as fruitful!

Happy new year all xxx

Car Boot Christmas Countdown - Day 10

It's Christmas Eve and the final day of the Car Boot Christmas Countdown, and today I bring you two very different seasonal albums.  The first is quite possibly the greatest ever recorded - Phil Spector's Christmas Album:

Phil Spector's Christmas Album (1963, this version 1983)

I've cheated a little here in that it wasn't a find from this year, but I see it all the time at boot sales and chazzas and couldn't bear to leave it out of the first ever Countdown. Originally released in 1963 as A Christmas Gift For You from Philles Records, the album has had several other different covers and titles:

Original cover and title is top right.

Featuring four acts from the Spector stable (Darlene Love, The Ronettes, Bob B. Soxx & The Blue Jeans and The Crystals), Phil applies his Wall Of Sound to a baker's dozen of Christmas tunes, resulting in two sides of glorious R&B-infused festive girl group pop of the highest order.  Overlooked at the time due to being released on the same day JFK was assassinated, it's now an undeniable classic that sits at no.142 on Rolling Stone's list of the 500 Greatest Albums Of All Time, and several tracks are Christmas radio staples.

It's an almost impossible task to pick out a favourite, but if pressed I'd have to choose the only original composition on the album; Darlene Love's magnificent (Christmas) Baby Please Come Home, which was in fact intended for Ronnie Spector, who apparently couldn't inject the amount of emotion required by her future hubby so it was passed to Darlene (I bet that went down well).  Even Bono couldn't ruin this song; U2's very good cover version is one of my favourites from the charity album A Very Special Christmas (1987), on which if you've listened to the cloudcast you'll know that Darlene herself sang backing vocals.

The final track Silent Night is Phil himself speaking over the music (and a little ooh-ing and ahh-ing from his artists), wishing us all a Merry Christmas & Happy New Year, and never sounding more like Kaa from The Jungle Book.

Tracklisting

Side1.
1. Darlene Love - White Christmas.
2. The Ronettes - Frosty The Snowman.
3. Bob B. Soxx & The Blue Jeans - Santa Claus Is Coming To Town.
4. The Crystals - Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town.
5. The Ronettes - Sleigh Ride.
6. Darlene Love - (It's A) Marshmallow World.

Side 2.
1. The Ronettes - I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.
2. The Crystals - Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer.
3. Darlene Love - Winter Wonderland.
4. The Crystals -Parade Of The Wooden Soldiers.
5. Darlene Love - (Christmas) Baby Please Come Home.
6. Bob B. Soxx & The Blue Jeans - Here Comes Santa Claus.
7. Phil Spector and Artists - Silent Night.



A quite different record cost me 50p; a budget label 70s release called Christmas Party Sing-Along:

The Music Makers - Christmas Party Sing-Along:
20 All Time Favourites (1973)

This collection of carols and Christmas songs in an easy listening style was released on the Hallmark subsidiary of Pickwick Records and is by a group called The Musicmakers, most likely a bunch of session singers and musicians, since their name only appears in very small lettering on the rear sleeve.  It's pretty straightforward, fairly unexciting stuff, although they roped in quite a nifty drummer for Jingle Bells.

The sleevenotes urge us to "get together Mum and Dad, Grandma, Grandad, the kids and neighbours and sing your hearts out to such all-time Christmas favourites as "White Christmas", "Rudolf" (you know who!), "Silent Night" and "Good King Wenceslas".

On listening, I imagine the singers as a clean-cut set of guy 'n' gals crowded round a couple of mics, wearing bright jumpers and scarves, Santa hats and cheesy grins, cheerily belting out these rather bland, generic covers before rushing off to Studio B to add their parts to the next Top Of The Pops album.

The songs are edited very close together, but there are no lovely segues between them, so each one begins and ends very abruptly, which is rather jarring.  Alright for a bit of background music then, or perhaps a singalong as intended, but not something you'd want to listen to that much.

Since its initial vinyl release in 1973, the album has come out on CD and download in various guises, this time crediting the group as The Mistletoe Singers:

From some of the online reviews it seems that these reissues are in fact poor quality vinyl rips, complete with crackle, pops and skip - not necessarily a bad thing in my opinion!

Anyway, you can judge for yourselves here:



Sadly, none of the tracks from this album made it on to the Car Boot Christmas 2014 Cloudcast, but it does feature one from the Phil Spector record.  Stream it here, or click the link to go to Mixcloud:

Car Boot Christmas 2014 by Car Boot Vinyl Diaries on Mixcloud

Well, that's the last of the Christmas posts.  If I get time over the holidays there'll be something special appearing on the blog for that weird period between Christmas and New Year, as long as I can manage a couple of hours of relative sobriety.  Thanks for joining me - whatever you're up to, have a very peaceful and happy Christmas!

Mini xxx 

Car Boot Christmas Countdown - Day 9

Welcome to Day 9 of the Car Boot Christmas Countdown!  Today's seasonal LP is an absolute classic that's much loved by many; the wonderful It's Christmas In Motown:

It's Christmas In Motown (1973)

This Music For Pleasure compilation was a UK-only release and brings together previously released Motown material from five of their biggest artists "..all dedicated to the furtherance of festive harmony".  It opens with what is quite possibly the best ever version of Up On The Housetop, here given an excitable pop-soul re-imagining by the Jackson 5, with Tito wishing for a guitar that never goes out of key, and Marlon in need of some new shoes "with lots of sole".  Originally written in the 19th century, the best known version of this song is country star Gene Autrey's.  Michael and co's barnstorming version couldn't be more different, and along with the other two songs representing them here it's taken from their 1970 "Jackson 5 Christmas Album".

Motown were no slouches when it came to exploiting the Christmas market, and in 1967 Stevie Wonder released the album "Someday At Christmas".  Three songs from this appear on "It's Christmas In Motown", including the sentimental One Little Christmas Tree written by Motown staffers Ron Miller and Bryan Wells, and a  great cover of the classic Christmas Song (Merry Christmas To You).

Rear cover

The pair of tunes offered up by the Temptations (Silent Night and Santa Claus Is Coming To Town from 1970's "The Temptations Christmas Card") are a little disappointing.  If you're looking for a seasonal Tempt's album to buy I'd highly recommend their 1980 album "Give Love At Christmas" for some top-quality Yuletide R&B - they even re-recorded a much better version of Silent Night for it.

Two of the best songs here come from Smokey Robinson & The Miracles.  Christmas Lullaby, co-written by Miracle Warren "Pete" Moore and two Motown writers tries to send us off to sleep with dreams of presents, including "something that Mommy will like".  Oo-er!  The rather Stax-y Christmas Every Day comes from the pen of Smokey himself and is essentially a love song with a vaguely Christmassy connection which first appeared on 1963's "Christmas With The Miracles".

Both tracks by Diana Ross & The Supremes on "It's Christmas In Motown" are taken from their 1965 album imaginatively titled "Merry Christmas".  They supply us with a perky Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer and lovely slowie My Christmas Tree written by Jimmy Webb (which in typical Motown recycling was also later recorded by the Tempts).  The latter song is my favourite, as Diana never sounded better.

I was really pleased to find this album earlier in the year at a boot sale, as not only did it cost just £1, it also replaced the rather scratched copy I already had.  Although its crackles conjured up a soothing log fire, it did have a couple of annoying skips!

There are loads of other Christmas offerings from Motown, many of the CD compilations duplicating tracks, so be wary and compare them before shelling out, but if you spot a vinyl copy of It's Christmas In Motown at a boot sale or chazza, be sure to grab it.

We're getting really close to Christmas day now, and the last installment of the countdown tomorrow (Weds 24th Dec) will feature two more festive boot sale LPs. Stream the Car Boot Christmas 2014 cloudcast below to get really Christmassy!

Car Boot Christmas 2014 by Car Boot Vinyl Diaries on Mixcloud

Car Boot Christmas Countdown - Day 8

On a sunny September morning this year I bought a stack of 50p albums from a car boot seller, including Selections From Irving Berlin's White Christmas:

Selections From Irving Berlin's White Christmas (1954,
this re-issue 1985)

White Christmas the movie was based on the 1942 film Holiday Inn, both starring Bing Crosby.  This album is not a true soundtrack however; because Crosby and co-star Rosemary Clooney were signed to different record labels at the time (Decca and Columbia respectively), Decca enlisted Peggy Lee to record Clooney's parts.  Columbia released its own not-quite-a-soundtrack-either the same year featuring just Clooney, called Irving Berlin's White Christmas.

Still with me?  In the film, Clooney's character has a sister; actress and dancer Vera-Ellen, whose singing parts were over-dubbed by Trudy Stevens, except for in the duet Sisters, where Clooney sang both parts.  On this album, however, as Clooney was unable to record, both parts are performed by Peggy Lee.  So in fact neither of the female stars of this well-loved Christmas movie appear on the album!

It doesn't matter a bit though.  From the opening salvo of The Old Man and Gee, I Wish I Was Back In The Army to the closing White Christmas, it's a lovely reminder of a great film (which I saw on TV this year as early as November 24th!) and a must for any festive record collection, even if the only properly Christmassy songs are the title track and the pretty awful Snow ("snow, snow, snow, snow..." - yes, we get it!).

Tracklisting

Side 1.
1. Bing Crosby & Danny Kaye - The Old Man.
2. Bing Crosby & Danny Kaye - Gee, I Wish I Was Back In The Army.
3. Peggy Lee - Sisters.
4. Danny Kaye with The Skylarks - The Best Things Happen While You're Dancing.
5. Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Peggy Lee, Trudy Stevens - Snow.
6. Bing Crosby & Danny Kaye - Blue Skies.
7. Bing Crosby & Danny Kaye - Mandy.

Side 2.
1. Danny Kaye with The Skylarks - Choreography.
2. Bing Crosby - Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep.
3. Peggy Lee - Love, You Didn't Do Right By Me.
4. Peggy Lee - What Can You Do With A General.
5. Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Peggy Lee, Trudy Stevens - White Christmas.


Another seasonal find from the seemingly long-ago days of September, this time for £1, was Festival Of Carols:

Festival Of Carols: 20 Christmas Favourites from Guildford Cathedral,
St. Paul's Cathedral& Westminster Abbey (1980)

Here Music For Pleasure pack in a total of 20 carols, all previously released by MFP and recorded during the 1960s by The Guildford Cathedral Choir, The Sunbury Junior Singers of the Salvation Army, The Choir of St. Paul's Cathedral and The Choir of Westminster Abbey.

Christmas wouldn't be complete without some proper traditional carols, and the choirs and organists here all do a fantastic job of turning me into a dewy-eyed old fool.  Moving stuff indeed.

Tracklisting

Side 1.
1. Once In Royal David's City.
2. While Shepherds Watched.
3. The Holly And The Ivy.
4. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen.
5. Unto Us Is Born A Son.
6. As With Gladness Men Of Old.
7. O'Little Town Of Bethlehem.
8. Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.
9. I Saw Three Ships.
10.Silent Night, Holy Night.

Side 2.
1. In Dulci Jubilo.
2. The First Noel.
3. In The Bleak Mid-Winter.
4. Good King Wenceslas.
5. The Rocking Carol.
6. The Coventry Carol.
7. It Came Upon A Midnight Clear.
8. Away In A Manger.
9. Ding Dong Merrily On High.
10.O'Come All Ye Faithful.

Come back again tomorrow (Tues 23rd Dec - getting close now!) for a real Christmas cracker of an album.  You can hear me playing my favourite selections from this year's Christmas vinyl haul on the Car Boot Christmas 2014 cloudcast using the player below, or by following the link to mixcloud.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I did making it - it's sure to get you in a festive mood if you're not quite there yet!

Car Boot Christmas 2014 by Car Boot Vinyl Diaries on Mixcloud

Car Boot Christmas Countdown - Day 7

I'd been hoping to find a copy of Elvis' Christmas Album on vinyl this year and it didn't take long at all, for in August I found three copies on the same boot stall.  They were priced at 50p but the seller was kind enough to give me one of them for nothing:

Elvis' Christmas Album (1957, this revised re-issue 1970)

Since its initial release in 1957 the album has been subject to several changes to both tracklist and artwork.  The biggest of these came with this 1970 Camden version and the complete dropping of the four gospel songs on Side 2 (originally from his 1957 EP Peace In The Valley) and the addition of the single If Every Day Was Like Christmas and the not-at-all-Christmassy b-side Mama Liked The Roses from his '69 Memphis sessions.

So, apart from Silent Night and a beautifully solemn O Little Town Of Bethlehem, it's secular songs all the way, beginning of course with the definitive version of Blue Christmas.  (At this point I must confess a preference for the Shakin' Stevens version because it was the first one I heard, plus my treasured copy of his Greatest Hits was much played during my childhood.)

The rest is split between more R'n'B/rock'n'roll songs like the lip-curling Here Comes Santa Claus (Down Santa Claus Lane) and the Teddy Bear-ish Santa Bring My Baby Back (To Me), and ballads such as If Every Day Was Like Christmas.  Top of the Christmas tree for me is the innuendo-ridden rocker Santa Claus Is Back In Town, which the king Elvis-es his way through wonderfully, with mentions of a black Cadillac, instructions to his baby to "hang up your pretty stockings" and a cheeky "Santa Claus is coming down your chimney tonight".  Excellent!

What really makes the album for me though, are the incredible backing vocals.  The Jordanaires and soprano Millie Kirkham are entirely responsible for injecting the Christmas spirit throughout, but particularly on slowies like I'll Be Home For Christmas, the two carols and of course Blue Christmas.

During next year's car boot season I'll be keeping my eyes peeled for an earlier version so I can get my mitts on those great gospel tunes, but for now I'll have to rely on Spotify: 



Pop back tomorrow (Monday 22nd Dec) for Day 8 of the Countdown, where you'll find two great Yuletide albums waiting for you under the tree.  Stream the Car Boot Christmas cloudcast below for 1½ hours of festive tunes gathered from the car boot sales and charity shops of Suffolk.  I really hope you enjoy listening!

Car Boot Christmas 2014 by Car Boot Vinyl Diaries on Mixcloud